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Monday – reflection

 

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I came home from church yesterday to find out that Keeper had gone missing.  She had slipped out the door before my husband could close it. He tried to follow her, but in his weakened condition, she proved to be more determined then he, and for his efforts he landed on the curb while she ran merrily on her way.  Of course, new to the area, she got lost.

As fate would have it, I had gone out without my cell.  He had no way to reach me, I was doing errands on my way back  home.  In brief, I was devastated, crushed beyond measure, every death in the last year, every parting that have visited my life this year, came crashing down on me.  The damn opened and I have never in my life known such emotional ripping apart of my “soul”  I cried, screamed, wailed, I scared myself.  Never in my life have I had such immediate pain and felt so ripped apart.

All I could think of was NOTHING, the grieving in my total being had taken over and all I could do was allow the emotions to express themselves.  Prayer, Pray Pray, Pray… in the  quiet spaces before the wailing began again & again, I called the church, the Humane Society, the Police…. my common sense prevailed, I did not use 911.. but called their main number.  my voice cracked I could barely speak my vocal chords were in shock, I’m sure.

Keeper is home.  Someone called animal control, they came brought her back to the shelter, checked her microchip, called the breeders*, who like knights in shining armour from days of old, jumped into their car and did their best not to speed into the city.  They  got the call at 3:15 or so,  the shelter closed at 4 pm.

It was a harrowing day, Keeper and I were in bed very early,  we slept till this morning, glued together in relief.  Poor Velcro, didn’t know what was happening around him, he is such a patient, and caring soul. The dogs commiserated happily when they met up.  Big brother was welcoming to his delinquent sister, he didn’t scold for the anxiety she unwittingly caused, in all four of her humans.

I don’t know why it was deemed necessary that I experience such a torrent of emotions, but… it did certainly allow for an emptying of any and all emotions I may have been holding back.  Life IS.

I am so grateful and thankful for the kindness of the strangers, that due to their caring  and good intentions, made the choices that brought Keeper home.

PL Precept #18  Each moment is a Turning Point

Oyashikiri

 

*Hounds of Freckashpeng

 

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