Who am I

Do you ever wonder who that person is looking back at you in the mirror. For years you have looked at that face, yet how often do you really see the face,and the eyes that are looking so intently back at you.
When we journey into the virtual world, we get to pick an avatar to represent us, it is the avatar that moves around and interacts for us with the other avatars in the virtual world.. Each avatar represents another person, who is sitting at a keyboard and looking at a screen. You can be talking to anyone, anywhere in the world connects to the Internet.
Each and everyone of us is in the game for a reason, to play, to build,design,educate, learn, the reasons are endless. So are the possibilities when it comes to what kind of an avatar you will use to represent “you”.
It is not until you are faced with the task of creating an outward appearance for yourself that you begin to realize that it is not as simple as it seems.
First we have to determine are we male or female. In the real world, we know the cards dealt to us, however in this virtual world, we can be whatever we chose to be.
We get to pick the colour of our skin, the shape of our bodies,, the colour of our eyes, and then when we do all of that, we have to dress ourselves, pick out the hair, finally we can have curly hair, and lots of it.
AND, because we get to pick our size and shape, we can then wear the shoes and outfits that we can’t wear in RL

The challenge can be so daunting, that many people give up before they even really start. I learned early on in the “game” that the choices we are asked to make, can be very helpful to us in learning to understand ourselves.

I’m only touching the surface here, we are only getting started. In this recent adventure, I have had to think long and hard about which avatar I would use. I already have established personalities and characters in SL. I realized that I did not want to use these characters because I liked who they are and the lives they have built for themselves over the years.
So, I dusted off the file on an avatar that I have till now only used when I needed a model. He/she had no defined personality and was simply an avatar. A dormant file/avatar in the game. Even the name of the avatar was non gender, Asia was especially used when I needed a male model for the ads/blogs.
Now Asia is a woman, and a Furry, (an avatar that is an animal with human characteristics) I started out thinking I would be a Neko (cat/feline) a Neko is a human with animal characteristics. But after several hours spent with the Neko I wasn’t connected to it. I felt no affinity.
Also what came into the equation is the other members you meet, who are also Neko,Furries, humans, Tinies,Dinkies, etc. Like in the RL the groups have their own culture, way of dressing, interests etc.
I have been absent from SL for some time, not playing as much as I used to, so I found that with the ever changing technology the products and items being offered, mesh, sculpts,animations etc.were different. Previous sources were no longer in business.
I thought I’d be a possat, I got the avatar put her on, but within minutes I didn’t feel right.

When I looked at myself as this avatar, I wondered to myself, what had I been thinking.  Where was I  “in my head” when I thought this is what I wanted to be?  this is what life is like, we do things, we purchase something because at the time, it was such a great buy or it really took our fancy, yet days later, it has lost its allure, and the search begins again.

Much like when I look in the mirror, I wonder who that is, and how she got to be where she is, what is she really thinking?  The person I have to ask is myself really, and the question again comes down to just who am I.  What am I doing here?  This could be a long meditation, a long on going chat with my inner self.  Meanwhile, life does go on, and I have another avatar in the making.  Does this mean that I have multiple personalities. Hmm stay tuned.

In PL we learn to continue and persevere to make our wishes and goals come true.  I’ve started this journey, I’m having fun working through my creative “wants” and the realities of my “self: images. I’ve been a lifetime getting to where I am today, guess I’m not about to stop the momentum now.  My friends call me a “shape shifter” (in SL)  I believe that is because, like in real life, I live the moment, and change is the only constant in life. =^_^=

comments anyone? Have fun in life, take time to play, we are only here “now”   I am guilty of taking life far too seriously, even when playing… I’m working on it.. one step at a time.     http://www.secondlife.com                                                           photos -Q