In conversation with a friend, she asked me a question about feelings, and hurts, something that had been bothering her for some time.In PL fashion, I replied “life is mirror” Intelligent and thoughtful, she was quiet for some time, then she said, I have heard that before, but I don’t know that I understand“. Then I had to pause, reflect and meditate on her response. My reply had been simple to me “life is a mirror” but in fact when I thought about it. I have had years of living with this perspective, and each time the challenge crossed my path, I learned a different lesson. fortunately our relationship is such that we converse over a period of days and even weeks sometimes.. so I have had time to “chew” on this one.
When we are hurt, sad, perplexed by the “perceived” action of others, we own the reaction, we own the thoughts. No one else is feeding them to us, they are ours, and ours alone. It may take some time, but at some point in time, we realize that the choices we made were our own. What takes longer is choosing to accept and own the situation you are living. The strength and courage to remove ourselves from the cycle of hurt, vulnerability and dependency. OOOHH OUCH did I actually say that word, write it, (takes a moment to read back a few lines)… yes I did, I said dependency, not a word I liked to associate with, but over the years I’ve learned to accept that it has been a lesson I’ve had to address more than once.
Mirrors, they can be our friend or our hardest task master. Melody Beattie in one of her books, said “Go with the flow” let go of fear and your need to control. Relinquish anxiety, ” I read those words many many years ago, I’ve never forgotten them, I remember highlighting them and reading them over and over again for weeks. She talked of being present, accepting where you are and who you are. Taking ownership of your emotions, actions and thoughts. Mirrors are a tool, they will only project to you what you are “seeing” in that moment.
When we look into a mirror, the only eyes looking back into ours, belong to “ me,myself and I.” Express your appreciation for your SELF today, look in the mirror, smile and say “thank you” ..Then find someone else in your world to say thank you to, saying it out loud is empowering, and a very nice sharing of a moment. Not only will the person you are thanking feel a smile, you will too One smile at a time we build a better future!